What I learned today was that Hot Mama can’t wait to marry me off. Essentially I have two girlfriends now. One is named Quinn, and the other is Charlotte, although she prefers to go by the name Charlie, even though she can’t talk and has no way of letting anyone else know that. I prefer to be called Sir Studly, but nobody is calling me that, so I don’t know how she’s pulling that off.
Anyway, it’s still odd to me that, even though I can barely drool and fart at the same time, Hot Mama wants me, Sir Studly, to marry either one of them, even though she has no idea if I’m even gonna be into hot blondes.
(I crack myself up.)